our summer to do list

This year we don't plan on allowing summer to pass without a few family adventures. This will be Lucas's last summer before kindergarten and Alara is now big enough to go on adventures. My husband and I agreed that this summer we would stay local. However, staying local doesn't mean no fun! While "swimming" that other morning, the kids and I complied a list of fun things that we would like to do. 

I thought I'd share our list. 

Here is our list of summer adventures.

• Take the train to the beach 
• Family trip to the San Diego Safari Park/Zoo 
• Day trip to the mountains for fresh air and hiking
• Try something new and unique to our local area 
• Go to a baseball game
• Go to a movie (this one is for Lucas since he has never been to a movie theater)
• Make ice cream 
• Go horseback riding at Grandma's house 

I'd love for more ideas - especially if it's local and or unique - let me know in the comments.  

cheez-its and church

Good Morning, and Happy Sabbath.

Last Sunday, I was asked to help decorate our church for the Christmas season. While unpacking the balcony garlands I took a trip down memory lane to one of my most embarrassing moments in church.

I laugh now. But not so much then.

I was in third or fourth grade. My family always sat front and center in the left side balcony (Sierra Visit). Our pastor was in the middle of a riveting sermon. He was hitting his points and driving home the importance of living a grace filled life. (Or something like that...I really don't remember what he was talking about). I do remember that I had squeezed the majority of my body through the iron rods of the balcony railing and was haphazardly leaning over the edge while stuffing my face with cheez-its. Back in those days, the balconies did not have the protective glass that they do today. As I was munching and crunching, curiously peering down at the congregation below gravity suddenly took over and I dumped the entire box of cheez-its over the side of the balcony. I'm not sure what the people below us thought as it rained small square cheesy crackers...but I can only imagine. The funny thing is that our pastor didn't even look up. I'm sure he must have noticed that it was raining crackers, or at least heard them hit the ground - but as far as I can remember it didn't phase him at all.

After I dumped the crackers, I dove for the ground and just laid there until the service was over. Frozen. Embarrassed. Ashamed. All I wanted was to disappear. Once the service was over, my mom took my sisters and I to the car while my dad went downstairs to clean up the mess.

My parents never scolded me, or gave me a hard time (until years later....).

The next Sabbath, we returned to our place in the balcony (without snacks) and I sat there very still. On the railing the pastoral staff had placed a large placard that read "Keep Children Away."  My dad took a black sharpie marker scribbled out children and wrote  "Pharisees" in its place.

We didn't attend church for a couple of weeks (not because of the cheez-its or placard). However, when did return to church the balconies had glass covering the iron railings. I don't know if I'm the reason why the church suddenly decided to get glass to cover the railings (its safer) but to this day that is how my dad tells the story.

The end.

real rather than perfect

"What would happen if we shared our real rather than our perfect?" - Nichole Nordeman 

Today, I had a moment of real rather than perfect. 

I'm not a fan of sharing the real. I like the perfect. 

This morning, I bravely got out the craft supplies for the kiddos. The plan was to make fall sun catchers. Prior to starting this project I checked pinterest for ideas, supply lists and samples. Pinterest had many exemplary examples with adorable children dressed in their finest sitting around gorgeous craft tables. I'm not sure who dresses small children in their finest for crafting, but apparently some people do. At our house, we craft in our pj's - that is if those under five are wearing anything besides their underwear at all.  

Lucas was excited to start. However his excitement was short lasting. And Alara just wanted to see how many pieces of tissue paper she could shove into her mouth before I'd notice. We were able to make at least two sun catchers before the kiddos decided that enough was enough and it was time for something else. 

I'm embarrassed to admit, but I got frustrated that my children weren't crafting like they were suppose to. As if there is a right or wrong way to craft! Our sun catchers didn't look like the examples provided by the perfect mama's with their perfect kids sitting around their gorgeous craft tables. Ours were real. But instead of embracing the real, I threw an internal tantrum striving for that unrealistic perfect. And sadly, by striving for that unrealistic perfect I ended up stressing myself out. What was suppose to be something fun and simple ended up being something more. 

So here I am sharing my real.

So what if our sun catchers didn't turn out as expected. I think they are better. They have personality. I am going to enjoy those flawed but beautiful sun catchers created by a two beautiful children.

Philippians 4:13

Being a stay-at-home-mom has its rewards and its challenges. This week I feel as if there have been more challenges then rewards. The kids have had too many long days and late nights in a row. They are tired, cranky and in need of a solid nights rest. 

...or maybe I am in need of a solid nights rest...and Jesus...or both.  

When I am tired, I get emotional.  And a tired emotional Mama + tired cranky kids = meltdowns all around! 

Hurray for early bedtime!! And Jesus. 

Last night during dinner, offspring #1 had a huge meltdown. Apparently his royal highness did not care for the cuisine chosen for the evening. His meltdown effected offspring #2 causing distress all around. Instead of handling things like a rational loving person, I found myself becoming rather ragey. It wasn't my best moment as a parent. But in my defense offspring #1 had been having meltdowns all afternoon and offspring #2 was feeling particularly clingy. In addition, my husband had called earlier letting me know that he was stuck in traffic and would be late. 

Later that evening I couldn't stop thinking about how I should have handled the dinner meltdown differently. I replayed the events in my head, analyzing what I should and shouldn't have done. I started to compare myself to other Mamas. I allowed my insecurities to take over. 

It is in the moments like the "Great Dinner Meltdown of 16'" when I just need to stop, take a deep breath and repeat Philippians 4:13 out loud over and over again. 

"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength" 

It is easy to become overwhelmed as a Mama of two little ones. I'm sure one day I'll look back and laugh and even miss the crazy dinnertime chaos.

Until then...

I'll keep pressing.

I'll keep praying. 

And I'll repeat Philippians 4:13 as many times as needed. 

Good Night. 

plagued

This week was brutal. 

I almost didn't write this post because I was to tired to get up and walk over to my laptop. 

(My laptop was less than three feet away). 

Since Christmas we have been plagued with a winter cold followed by a stomach bug. The kids have been sick, my husband and I have been sick and everyone's sleep schedule is off! I'm worn out. I've been reduced to an unhappy Mommy just going through the motions. My emotions are raw and all I want to do is run away and hide under the covers in my bed. 

Last night I hit my lowest point. After a long day dealing with a sick toddler and a fussy baby, it was bedtime and both kids were asleep. My husband and I were about to start the next episode of whatever we were watching on Netflixs when Alara woke up crying. I spent the next twenty minutes rocking her to asleep again, praying that maybe this time she will sleep soundly. She woke up less than ten minutes later screaming. I'm ashamed to admit this - but I was angry and the first thing to pop out of my mouth was "f**k, this. Why can't she just go to sleep." 

Not my best parenting moment. 

The minute that four letter word came flying out of my mouth I felt ashamed. My husband wasn't to happy with me either. And as I rocked Alara back to sleep all I could think of was how I had failed as a Mother. 

Not a good feeling. 

That night Alara actual slept. My prayers were answers. It is amazing what a good nights rest will do for the soul. I felt like a whole new person. 

This morning a friend sent me timely and much needed text that said "You can do it! I believe in you." 

I can do this. 

I am a good mom.   

TGIF

When your three year old announces at breakfast that he "broke his day" you know it is going to be a rough one. Upon hearing his announcement I brewed an extra large and strong cup of tea. I knew I was going to need it...

This week has been challenging. I haven't been at 100%. Some mornings I woke up and was able to get things done. I felt great, energetic, ready to conquer the day! Other days...not so much. Some mornings all I want to do was sit on the couch, turn on Netflixs, cover my head and go back to sleep.

Or as my overly dramatic son would say "Mamma, I need a new day!"  

I hear ya!

Some days I've got it together, and others..not so much.

My toddler is the same way. Some mornings he wakes up, fresh and ready for his day. He's got his lightsaber and jedi robes all ready to fight off Darth Vader. And other days..well...he wakes up and announces that he "broke his day."

We - including my toddler - all have our good days and our bad days.  I need to keep in mind that grace and forgiveness that I want on my bad days is the same that I need to give my husband and kids when they are having a bad day.

...and if all else fails..its an early bedtime for everyone! 

tossed salad and scrambled eggs

For the last couple of weeks my husband has been binge watching Frasier. I feel that the intro song for the show fits my scattered thoughts perfectly. Today I'm tossing together a little bit of this and a little bit of that...and hoping for the best.

Thought #1:

Lucas has been boycotting dinner. He has always been a picky eater, but lately he has been more opinionated about it. All I have to say is "I'm starting dinner" or "dinner is ready" or simply say the word "dinner" out loud and he A) throws himself dramatically to the ground wailing or B) runs away and hides in his closet or C) a combination of the two. His flare for the dramatics would be amusing if it wasn't so frustrating to to deal with it during dinnertime.

Thought #2:

I'm feeling sleep deprived. It's a common complaint of mothers with small children. Last night Alara decided to abandon her usual nighttime routine of sleeping for six to seven hours at a time. Instead she opted for waking up every couple of hours....she was hungry, she wanted to party, she was cold, she felt lonely, she needed to be close...the list of reasons could go on for days. In addition, Lucas had a whale in his bed. He couldn't sleep until my husband got up and heroically saved the day by evicting the whale from his bed.

Thought #3:

I'm thankful for having a strong "village" of supportive family and friends. This week, the kiddos and I had the opportunity to swim, hike and play with friends and family. I love being a stay-at-home mamma and wouldn't trade it for the world. However, the job can get tiring and lonely. There have been times where I feel like I'm on my own island...with two needy humans and one extremely needy dog...for company. It is refreshing (and necessary) to get out and socialize with other adult humans while our little humans play.

till next time..

I did something this morning that said that I'd never do...

...rescue kittens...

I'm not a cat person. Growing up we had several indoor house cats. That experience cured me of ever wanting a cat for my own. I don't like the smell of cats, kitty litter, kitty food and or claw marks on furniture!

While walking this morning, Lucas and I heard tiny pitiful mewing sounds coming from an orange tree that we were passing by. Looking up, I saw two kittens about six to eight weeks old clinging to the thin branches of the tree. As much as I don't like cats, I couldn't leave the kittens. I stopped the stroller, reached up in the tree and pulled the kittens free. Lucas was thrilled to be rescuing kittens! He firmly believes that firefighters have two jobs - to fight fires and to rescue kittens.

As the kittens follow us home all I could think about was...

"What am I doing!?"
"What is Richard going to say"
"Am I crazy?"
"I wonder if my sister will want some kittens?"

Now I'm stuck trying to figure out what to do with two adorable kittens. Our neighbor gave me a list of places that might shelter the kittens. However, currently they have made my backyard their home. Our dog is curious, but cautious. Full size cats scare him.

I'm hoping my post on facebook will entice a kitty friendly family or individual  to adopt the kittens.

Any takers? They are cuties! 

the waiting game...or confessions of a venting pregnant mamma...

I've made it to the end of 38 weeks and still no sign of baby Alara's grand arrival. I'd post a picture of my pregnant self, but honestly I'm not in the mood to photograph my large protruding stomach, round face, swollen hands and feet and out of shape thighs. I'm not a fan of being pregnant and I'm looking forward to putting these days behind me.

I'm not trying to sound ungrateful about the little one growing inside of me. I'm beyond thankful that I have a healthy baby girl on the way. However, I'm tired, my back is sore, my hips are sore, and if I have to hear my husband make beeping sounds (the kind that semi trucks make when backing up) I might just loose it!

...And I've been having nightmares of my water breaking somewhere public! For an example...in the middle of the grocery store...or maybe at Target...

I'm ready to hold my baby girl.

I'm ready to kiss her cheeks.

 I'm ready to rock her to sleep.

I'm ready.

To keep myself busy, I've been nesting like crazy! I've done more Goodwill runs this past week then I've done in the last several months. I've been trying to think projects that I should try and finish before Alara's arrival. I've put the finishing touches on Alara's nursery, I've cleaned up the front yard, trimmed wayward plants, pulled weeds, walked the dog, cleaned out the closets and worked on reorganizing several of our random cupboards.

I'm ready.

St. Patrick's Day & A Conversation with Lucas

Driving to my parent's house can be wearisome for Lucas. He can usually get about half way before the boredom sets in and the fussing starts. On this particular trip, his biggest complaint was the lack of trains, fire hydrants and ambulances on the freeway. This lack of entertainment (apparently his stack of books and toy air planes weren't enough) resulted in the kicking of the front passenger's seat and squealing loudly. For the sake of my sanity (and my car seats), I asked Lucas to tell me what he wanted for his birthday and after much deliberation he responded by announcing "R2D2."

Alrighty then.

His answer to my "what do you want for your birthday" distraction question led to the following series of questions....and I found the answers highly amusing.

Me: Who's Mamma?

Lucas: Princess Leia!

Me: Who's Daddy?

Lucas: Darth Vader!

Me: Who's Dada?

Lucas: ...hmm...he's Obi-Wan.

Me: Who's Baba?

Lucas: Han Solo...hmm...probe droid.

Me: Who's Dadi?

Lucas: Aunt Beru.

Me: And who is Lucas?

Lucas: R2D2!

I'm impressed. Thanks to Daddy, this guy knows his Star Wars and at least Lucas thinks I'm Princess Leia instead of Chewbacca.

This discussion of Star Wars kept him entertained for the remainder of the journey and we arrived at my parent's with my sanity intact.

It wasn't until I noticed that all three of my brothers were wearing green that I realized that it was St. Patrick's Day. You would think that I would have noticed after all of the beautiful St. Patrick's Day pins on Pinterest and shamrock shakes plastered on the McDonald's billboards that something was up. 

Lucas had a blast playing at Grandma's house in the country, and I enjoyed kicking back in the shade. Much better than hiking around the Wild Animal Park in the warm sun. 

However, now I gotta find an R2D2 for Lucas's upcoming birthday. 

wedding @ Point Loma

One week ago, I watched one of my best friends from college walk down the aisle. It was a beautiful wedding, with a beautiful bride. The wedding details were amazing. Her choice of purple and grey complimented the ocean view venue. I loved the candy bar, and the cake was delicious! 

As a pregnant bridesmaid, I was most nervous about squeezing into my dress. I bought the dress back in December - before I was showing and after much deliberation I decided to buy one size up. About a month ago, I went to the store to pick up the dress happy that it still (if snugly) fit. However, from the week that I picked up the dress to the week of the wedding my baby bump grew. Thankfully, I made through the ceremony. For the reception I threw on my black maternity sweater and had another bridesmaid unzip the top of the dress until I could change into something else. 

I think the best part of the wedding was seeing how happy the bride was. She was positively glowing all night long. I'm so thankful that I got to be apart of her special day and I'm looking forward to making many new memories together as two married ladies. :) 

Merry Christmas from the Harrisons

If you didn't get a Christmas card from the Harrisons...don't worry, we are still friends. This year I really dropped the ball on the Christmas chores. We did get the house decorated, the tree set up, and the outdoor lights up, however the Christmas cards, baking, and gift shopping was put off until the last minute. In addition, I have completely ignored Thursday's Child. This year our Christmas celebrations stretched over a period of two days. Christmas eve day we spent the afternoon with my parents, than Christmas eve we partied with my husband's family. On Christmas day, we quickly opened gifts at home before jetting off to brunch with Dadi and Dada. We ended Christmas day with a family party at my Grandma's house. It was truly a Christmas miracle that I made it though the past couple of days with my insanity intact.

With everything we had going on, I became a grumpy, stressed out Mommy. Just ask my husband. I was so stressed about making sure I got gifts for everyone on my list (within our mere budget), and that those gifts got to the intended recipient, that I never got the chance to sit back and enjoy Christmas. So now...on December 26th I am going to sit back with a cup of hot chi and relax by my beautiful tree and enjoy what little I have left of this holiday season. 

Pillars of the Earth and World Without an End

One year ago, my husband introduced me to books on tape by audible. My life was changed forever! Back in the olden days, pre-baby and pre-housework, I had time to read and finish books. Now, I'm lucky if I am able to read a chapter or two per night. However, on a positive note Lucas's ever growing love for books does ensure that I read "Go, Go, Cars" and "Dig, Dig, Digging."  

I recently finished listening to "Pillars of the Earth" and "World Without an End" by Ken Follett. Each novel is approximately forty hours long and took several weeks to complete. "World Without an End" was written as a sequel to "Pillars of the Earth." However, the novels (in my humble opinion) could be read in any order, or stand alone as individuals.

The novels take place in the fictional town of Kingsbridge, England.  In "Pillars of the Earth," Follett weaves together a 12th century narrative surrounding the events of the building of the Kingsbridge Cathedral during a time when England was in a civil war. One hundred and fifty-seven years later, "World Without End" takes place. The novel incorporates the start of the Hundred Years' War between England and France and the Black Plague.

I read "Pillars of the Earth" first, and I'm glad that I did. It had a better story, the characters were interesting, and I liked how the author used the building of the Kingsbridge Cathedral as a framing device. The first half of "World Without an End" was too similar to "Pillars of the Earth." However, towards the second half of the novel things start to pick up when the black plague hits Kingsbridge. Compared to "Pillars," the character development isn't as good in "World Without an End." 

Overall, I'd give "Pillars of the Earth" 9 out of 10. And "World Without an End" an 7 out of 10.